Top ten annoying frosh questions you'll be asked (over and over again)

9. "What college are you in?" Asked by a frosh trying to act like a Yale insider; he's probably never seen half of the colleges, let alone spent time inside one, so divulging yours is a futile endeavor. Seeing as he's asked the question all night, it might be fun to answer, "You don't remember?" or "Stop asking me that! Are you stalking me?"

8. "Weren't you at Freshperson Conference/PROP/Bulldog Days?" A definite baldfaced pickup line. Answer with a firm "No" and move away even if you were--or if he/she is cute...

7. "Are you a freshman?" Don't ever ask this question; it only serves to identify you as one. Upperclassmen can tell just by looking.

6. "Where else did you apply?" This question represents a whole body of information about which nobody at Yale cares, save ego-deficient frosh looking for acceptance. Other taboos: your SAT scores, romantic conquest and apocalypses, and anything else about yourself you think might impress people (amazingly, all of us got into Yale). If you must answer, "San Quentin" is usually good for a laugh.

5. "Do you sing?" Run like the wind. This is an upperclass singer in sheep's clothing, trying to lure you into rushing his/her a capella group. Run even if you do sing; you will make more than enough friends during Rush; it's nice to meet people who don't care about your voice. If you don't sing but stay to talk, you will end up rushing. Trust me.

4. "Where's the party?" Perhaps the dumbest question of all; the whole campus is a party the first week. Have some innocent fun with this lost soul by describing in detail the big party where the important members of the Yale publications, singing groups, political associations, and secret societies groom their future successors; avoid revealing its location.

3. "What classes are you taking?" Classes? It's still September!

2. "Is that your real face?" I hope you won't be asked this as much as I was, but if you are, I've always found "No" to be a good answer.

1. "Is this cool or what?" At last, a good (and easy) question. Yes, being at Yale is indeed cool. Enjoy it.

—Alex Funk

Back to You Are Here...