For those of you with more subversive taste...

You'll probably be on Old Campus for less than five minutes before the diversity of Yale smacks you across your face. You'll marvel at it and actually say things like, "This place is diverse, man!" or "I feel like I'm on MTV's TheReal World, it's so diverse here." And it's all true—where else could you make friends from far-off, exotic lands like Greece and Oklahoma and learn about the bizarre ways of the Canadians?

But despite being privy to this smorgasbord of culture, you'll find that your weekends are always the same. You'll hang out with friends, or maybe you'll go to a fraternity and drink. While this may sound exciting for those of you who have never let go of Mommy's hand long enough to come within smelling range of a beer (the first week of school proves that 90 percent of you are able to get drunk off a thimbleful of mouthwash), I promise that it will get dull fast.

To save yourselves from the inevitable onset of ennui, you'll most likely have to turn to the darker corners of the ivory tower and associate with groups that won't be advertising at the freshman bazaar: deviant groups.

Now, for those of you who don't know, deviants are just like you or me, except that they have more fun. While most of us end up doing the same thing all the time, deviants do it more outrageously, infusing it with the holy trinity of deviancy: sex, drugs, and rock n' roll. For the convenience of you prospective deviants, I'll break down the various fringe groups at Yale into the three aforementioned categories and address each individually.

Sex: While some people aren't into drugs or are happy humming the top 10 hits on MTV, we all (even religious types) would like a little more sex in our lives. For this purpose, we recommend making friends with the Pundits. These merry pranksters think that everything is more fun in the buff, be it going to a party (yes, they throw naked parties) or going to the library (they go to the Sterling and Cross Campus Libraries the night before finals start, clad only in their birthday suits, shouting "Happy Exams!" and throwing candy at the stressed). Also check out the Society of Orpheus and Bacchus (SOBs), a singing group whose parties are rumored to turn into wild orgies. For those whose sexual tastes lean toward the more perverse, join a frat. Word around campus is that [[Delta]][[Kappa]][[Epsilon]] (rhymes with geek, but with a [[Delta]] for "Duh...") makes its pledges and drunken party guests get intimate with a dog.

Drugs: Hard to come by. Consider your stay at Yale an every-man-for-himself event. You might want to check out Bong and Keg Society (B&K) if you're fiending for a hit, but even they aren't a sure bet, and their parties are usually kept quieter and a lot more private than frat gatherings. Any drugs harder than pot are kept even more quiet. People at Yale generally don't use all that many drugs, and the few who do probably won't share.

Rock 'n Roll: If you're among those who think that everything on MTV and the radio sucks, then you're going to be a deviant in the Yale crowd. If you want to hear new music that you think doesn't suck, you're going to have to actively pursue it and not wait around for it to find you. The good news is that getting a show on WYBC's student freeform station, 1340 AM, isn't at all difficult, and there are few restrictions on what DJs can play. Yale's music scene is very do-it-yourself, and the best way to hear new music is through friends. They'll introduce you to some brilliant out-there stuff. You'll talk about starting your own fanzine. You might even get around to doing it.

The do-it-yourself approach is the best way to break up the monotony of college life. If you get tired of the way other people throw parties, throw one your own way with your own creative dress code and your own music, dammit. Your guests may be few and far between, but you'll have a better time as a result. Graphic by Matt Wiegle.

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