Tune in to Yale radio

"Yale Radio, 1340AM, WYBC, New Haven. You're listening to Signifying Nothing. I'm SAM!!! and I'm tired and confused, about to fall dead, or at least in love. Or maybe not. Anyway...you just heard Sun Ra's `Space is the Place.' Tonight's theme is geographical locations, and if space isn't part of our cosmic geography, I don't know what is. Only problem is, I'm plumb out of geography records, so I think I'll go a little more conceptual. Next up is the Stooges' `Down on the Street.' `The Street' is a geographical location—right? Well, just pretend it is..."

There I go, quoting myself again. Maybe I just like the sound of my own voice. Maybe that's why I have a radio show. And maybe that's why you should have a radio show too. Just think: two hours of you, transmuted into a waveform, on people's radios and in people's ears. People will like you: I've gotten calls from "Dave the lonely grad student," the frisbee team, and my friend Dan, demanding that I play a 15-minute-long song by Yes (don't worry, I didn't). For the egoist in you itching to get out: Yale Radio, WYBC.

Of course, there's a little thing I like to call "music." That's important too. I'm music director for 1340AM and we get music, lemme tell you, and, oh my, is it stellar! Why, just yesterday I threw out two novelty records and the Squirrel Nut Zippers' Christmas album (all right, three novelty records) because we had to make room for Quality. We get buckets of music, and at least dippers of Quality.

Genres too, we got 'em aplenty: rock, hip-hop, jazz, techno...And sub-micro-genres: spazzcore, nerd-o-funk, psychedelic spoken-word. And you can play it, this big ole heap o' records, this variegated clump o' freeform.

Are you a groupie? With WYBC, you can book that band you love so much, go wild with them, and bear their love children—or engage them in a heated discussion on the merits of their limited-edition lathe-cut 1993 split seven-inch on a defunct Cambodian label.

For you high-powered types, not to worry. 1340AM is high-powered as well, with 1,000 watts of radio power, and 28.8K of Internet power at wybc.com. And for you even higher-powered types, we have an FM station too, 94.3. It plays gospel and r&b and is the second highest-rated station in New Haven. You can rule the world from a cozy booth in our brand-new digital studios or destroy it like Orson Welles on War of the Worlds. You have the power—the high power.

To summarize: your ego, your music, your concerts, your high power—your transglobal hegemonic monoculture. All this after a few hours of training. Where else? WYBC.

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