Ezra Stiles

Here's the part where you score: hey, if you wanna see your name in print, get off your ass and head for the house. That's right, the House of Payne. And in our backyard, we play prison rules, baby.

So far, men's v-ball has slammed the competition and is sporting a 2-0 record: led by captain Dave "I'll set 'em up, you knock 'em down" Offner '98, they're getting jiggy with it, as are Jared "One-eye" Kelly '98, Fabio '98, Matt "not Maloney" McClure '99, Geoff "not so" Suttle '00, Pat "Bam Bam" Bumatay '00, Mike "Ace" Hargis '00, Michael Gerber "Baby" '01, and Iz...plese save me a shirt.

B-ball's knockin' 'em dead, too. A- hoops beat down BK as captain Chris Petrie "dish" '98 led the assault on the hapless BK-eons, assisted by James "Answer: Part Two" Perkins '00, "The Triple Threat": Justin Berger '99, Michael Falencki '00, and some other big frosh dude, plus the eight "sixth man." B-hoops is undefeated and will go unbeaten (not counting the first 12 games): led by the Three Musketeers '98 plus the other 38 members. They're going all the way, baby.

Kendra "Sock-it-to-them" Fleming '99, Ximena "He-Man, by the power of Grayskull" Vidal '00, Rashida "Stiles can only" Braggs '99 "about you," Santi "Oh shoot!" Duewel '00, Helen "Give 'em hell on the court" Chan '99, Mel "Volleyball Diva" Huang '98, Roopa "The `Beautifulest' of the 50" Purushothaman '01, Jenny "Last minute life saver" Chang '99, and Rachel "I haven't played in eight years, but I'm still a stud" Germany '99 led the women's v-ball juggernaut, and came into the weekend after drubbing of TD and BK. As for the rest of the teams, we'll just say, they're all undefeated, and we'll spare the rest of the colleges the embarrassment of having to re-live painful memories.

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