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Jonathan Edwards
Twenty-three and six. JE, like chicken salad, is on a roll. Not on rye, not in a wrap, not on a baguette. On a roll. And we're tastier than tuna tenderbites on a Tuesday. But we're the sandwich that no one can devour. We're the sandwich that takes a bite out of you!The only thing crispier than our lettuce is our shooting. Our hoops teams have lost thrice and won twelvice. A-hoops has been particularly delectable, continuing their undefeated run. Lettuce assure you, Andrew "Arugula" Krause '00 will lead Eric "Romaine" Johnson '01, Jake "Collard Greens" Borden '00, and fellow greens (get it? 'cause JE's color is green, and we're making lots of veggie jokes) to an end-of season showdown against their rivals the "Limp Iceberg" Piersonites.
Of course, the meat of this hoagie is our ice hockey team. Juicy yet tender, full of protein, great with Saucy Susan, and undefeated. They pile on the pastrami so high that the refs have to tell them to ease up. Joey "Italian Sausage" Cristofaro '02 and Sarah "Canadian Bacon" MacGregor '02 carve up the competition like a turkey. And that's no baloney!
Like the perfect condiments, men's and women's volleyball spice up our sub. Sasha "Worcestershire" Waring '03, Will "Mayo" McGrath '00, and Andy "Jon Mustard" Graham '02 give the men their flava. The women, guided by Carolyn "Wasabi" Nguyen '00, make their opponents cough and gag.
As for the rest of JE, the "Squash" team and water polo teams continue their nine-month unbeaten streak. Come to think of it, we're not a sandwich, we're a slamwich! And we come with a big fat pickle.
(Compiled by Oscar Meyer and the Krauszer's deli guy.)
All materials © 1999 The Yale Herald, Inc., and its staff.
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