LGBT Coop should welcome straight allies

By Amanda Poppei

As a straight woman, I have found it nearly impossible to become part of the gay rights movement at Yale. I have gay friends. I proudly display my diversity pin on my bulletin board. I do not tolerate homophobic jokes and I make sure everyone knows it. I listen to (warning, blatant stereotype to follow) Ani DiFranco. I have no problem watching a couple of the same sex display their affection. I'm supportive, dammit!

More importantly, I see gay rights as the most significant and influential movement of our generation. I envision a world in which marriage is a union between two people who love each other, where a family is defined by love, where insurance companies recognize same-sex partners, and where hospital visits aren't restricted to traditional husbands and wives. I want a world where there is no closet to come out of, a world where no one automatically assumes you're straight. Hollywood movies will feature happy, healthy same-sex relationships just about people, not about gay people. So why doesn't Yale's LGBT Coop have a place for me to be active?

According to friends in the Coop, there has been some discussion of an allies group, but nothing much ever came from it. There were worries that no one would attend, that straight people would be too intrusive, that it wasn't necessary. I've talked to some straight friends who say their only worry about joining such a group would be that others might think they were gay. Good lord, there are worse mistakes to make...thinking I'm gay isn't nearly as bad as, say, thinking I'm a Group IV major.

But what, you may ask, would a straight allies group do? I don't have all the answers, but I think I have some. I'd like to go to rallies, write to senators, put an end to stereotypes. There are endless opportunities for education, for helping straight allies better learn how to create more straight allies. But mostly I'd just like to let people know that I am here, for better or for worse, to do whatever I can to help.

Perhaps there are some legitimate arguments against a straight allies group. One of the most prevalent is that as a straight woman, I cannot possibly understand what my gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered peers are going through. That's probably true. I freely admit that I am the recipient of special privileges, accorded to me by my socially acceptable status. I will never have to defend my choice of partners (except to my parents, of course, who could care less about the gender but would rather I never date anyone in theater again). I will never have to defend my right to have a child. I realize I am lucky. But the whole point is that I should not be lucky, that these should not be special privileges. They should be considered basic human rights.

And even if there are other, more powerful reasons to oppose a straight allies program, let me present some arguments for it. First of all, no civil rights movement that I can think of was won by the minority alone--there is an undeniable power in numbers. Second, this is an issue about which I feel very strongly--shouldn't I be able to voice my opinions?

Finally, and most importantly, this is an issue which affects every one of us. I may not be fighting for myself, but I am fighting for my friends, my family, my teachers, because without them I am nothing. As the saying goes, while one person is enslaved, none of us is free. I appeal to the Coop, to its leaders and to its members: let me help you fight.

Amanda Poppei is a freshman in Calhoun.

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