ELItorial: Lights, camera, and action!

By Peter Smith

1. Rocky (1976): You haven't lived if you haven't heard one of your friends cry the familiar "Adriaaaaaan!" which originated in this movie. Sylvester Stallone is Rocky Balboa, who, despite his bulging biceps and tough training regimen, is just an average guy with a dream of being a professional boxer. He boxes everything from people to slabs of meat, and he jogs around several famous Philadelphia landmarks before his big match with the reigning champ, Apollo Creed. His determination and willpower represent the heart of any athlete's dream. How many times have I punched a punching bag thinking I'm Rocky himself? Probably the same countless number of times I psyched myself up for a game by listening to the Rocky theme. He never gave up, even though he lost. It's too bad he didn't beat Apollo, though, because we all could have been spared the less-than-spectacular sequels.

2. Slap Shot (1977): What's not to love about a hockey movie teeming with alcohol, humor, gambling, and gratuitous violence? I have no shame in admitting that I'm a big fan of the Charleston Chiefs. Paul Newman and his teammates live the life many guys dream of, and all of their immaturity and debauchery is rewarded at the end with a parade through town honoring their achievements. And those twin dorks with the glasses who turned out to be the most violent ones on the team? Absolutely classic. Most women would probably find the movie, at the very least, to be sexist and rude. Considering the high number of unrelated-to-the-plot naked females, they're probably not far off--but I still love it. But I don't like it just because it's a guy movie, I like it because of it depicts hockey in such a ridiculous yet familiar manner. For those of you who can't handle the humor, I say get over it. Just kick back with a couple friends and allow yourself to laugh your ass off.

3. Caddyshack (1980): Bill Murray and Chevy Chase, smart-asses extraordinaire, were at the peak of their careers in this comedic gem. And when they were at the top, there was no one who could outwit them. Murray, a groundskeeper for a country club, knocks the heads off flowers while Chase downs the tequila shots. In the background, Rodney Dangerfield entertains with his customary loud and crass comments while Cindy Morgan can't seem to keep her clothes on. After a while, you forget that the movie is supposed to be about golf. Perhaps it shouldn't qualify as a sports movie--does golf really qualify as a sport? Maybe just another one for the chauvinists, but with lines such as, "You'll get nothing and like it," how can you not be entertained?

4. The Natural (1984): My childhood is colored with memories and dreams of being Roy Hobbs (Robert Redford) and hitting the home run in the ninth inning with the "Wonderboy" bat. For crying out loud, my parents even won one of the bats used in the movie, and I have fake Roy Hobbs baseball cards amongst my old, genuine ones. Maybe now that I'm older and more cynical I might think that Redford was too old to be playing such a boyish role, but I didn't care at the time. This took the dream of every little baseball player and put it into real life. For that alone, it earns its place among the select few of this list.

5. Major League (1989): Simply one of the best movies of all-time in any category. This farcical treatment of America's favorite pastime takes you through the formation of the Cleveland Indians, a notoriously shoddy baseball team which, in the movie, is sabotaged by the owner, who wants to move them to Florida. Charlie Sheen plays Rick Vaughn, a near-sighted pitcher who was recently released from jail. Tom Berenger plays a catcher with bad knees, struggling to put his career and life back in order, and Wesley Snipes is "Willie Mays Hayes" who, despite his tendency to hit pop-ups, runs his way onto the team. With his funny glasses and wild pitching, "Wild Thing" Vaughn leads the unlikely motley crew all the way to the League Championship.

The movie mocks everything from baseball to religion, and there's even a love story. But what puts this movie above the rest is the boisterously entertaining sportscaster Harry Doyle, played by Bob Uecker. As Vaughn pitches over people's heads, Doyle sarcastically remarks, "Jussssst a bit outside!" or "Tried the corner and missed!" You don't even have to be a sports fan to love this movie.

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