Timothy Dwight

Ummm...are we, like, ever going to lose?

Tennis. Men's football. Coed football. Table tennis. Golf. Women's soccer. All... undefeated. To the TD athletes who make up these stellar teams: you deserve sincere congratulations. Your efforts thus far have been exemplary, and there is no reason to believe that your sheer dominance will be fading any time soon.

Individual props: Steve "I just smoked you like" Salmon '00--your coed football skills are in a category of their own. Loud shouts out to Tiffany "I'm" Zwicker "than you are" '99, Caitlin "Socks" Klevorick '02, and Drew "RJ" Ellsworth '99. Robert Winslow '00 is bound for the Hall of Fame. George Lai "to Me," Nnamdi "OK"eke, and Luke "but I wanted to go to Toshi Station to pick up some power converters..." Garrett--freshman excellence.

On to the tennis rackets...our male freshman firing squad: Nnamdi Okeke, Matt "89 mph" Garrett, Jack "-attack" Lin, "Say" Hayden Gallary: keep coming out. Our women, Joelle "The General" Laszlo '99, Rebecca "The Hammer" Widiss '99, and Shana "Jewish Thunder" Crystal '01...and in table tennis, captain Ilya "Emails" Kushnirsky '01 deserves high praise. Keep our women players unbeaten.

Finally, a word on men's soccer: we're missing our best. Greg Tigani '99, Matt Kennedy '02, Jake Dreyfack '99, Zheng Wang '01, Christian Williams '99, Mike Morris '01, Chris Gibbons '99, Ryan Weinberg '00, Mark Bratton '01, Zach Boisi '01, Dean Pimenta '01--with you guys, we're unbeatable. Add a few more soccer games to our victory board, and no other college can even stay close. Ashé, baby.

(Compiled by IM secretaries who are proud of their dean.)

Back to IMs...