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BerkeleyWinter in New Haven. Cold. Desolation. Stupid stupid sections with stupid stupid people (oh wait, that's all the time). Really dirty snow. And BK dominance in IMs. Nobody does winter like Berkeley. All the other colleges will rue the fact that we are now so close to the gym--merely a quick saunter away from the battlefield.We shall dominate on all fronts: we'll play squash like we all went to prep school and hockey like we were born in Canada. We'll bowl like we're fat people and we'll play hoops like we all have shoe contracts. We'll swim like we're doped-up Olympians and we'll block, set, and spike like, well, a kick-ass volleyball team. It will all come together just like an episode of Perfect Strangers. We will achieve peace and harmony with ourselves through the suffering of our opponents. We will ignore the prognostications and pontifica-tions of others as we beat the living crap out of all of them. Come now, Berkeleyites, let's hop on the BK train. Barrie, Sarah, and Mike are at the helm, and they want everyone to take a ride (whoo-whoo!) as we roll over everything in our path. I see a lot of moose, ashes, half-naked people, and whatever the hell Calhoun calls themselves on the track.
(Compiled by someone who is quickly running out of similes.)
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