Bialik

What gives? The Mets won me $2,000 last week, and kept me far ahead of the rabble--but their series in Montreal left a taste far worse than the JE dining hall food I just had the misfortune of consuming. In the end, though, they'll make the playoffs ($1,000). Meanwhile, Mark and Sammy--on second thought, forget about them. I'm much more excited about Yale's imminent sweep of field hockey and soccer at Harvard ($500 each). Finally, look for women's golf to place in the top two at the YaleInvitational ($1,000).
Last Week: +$1,000. Current Balance: $10,500.

Breglio

Last week, just like Jerry Seinfeld, I came out "Even Steven." But now it's time to put it in high gear. Women's golf came through for me last week, so this week give me $2,000 on the ladies to place in the top three in the Yale Invitational, and the same goes for women's cross country at Western Ontario ($500). With the preseason looming, NBA officials and players will remain pathetically unable to negotiate ($1,000). And lastly, I must not desert my Yankees. I have full confidence that they will gloriously set the all-time AL win record ($1,000.50), and Bernie will win the batting title ($500).
Last week: $0. Current Balance: $4,259.50.

Goldenberg

So last week sucked, but this is Smack, where I get my money for nothing and my picks for free. With that in mind, I'm back and, by the way, you chuckleheads don't stand a chance. I've realized the errors of my ways, so watch as the football team dismantles an overconfident Husky squad this Saturday ($100). Men's rugby will crush Fairfield ($500), and men's soccer will spank the Cantabs silly ($500). McGwire will andro his way to the HR title ($500), perhaps newsworthy enough to deserve two of the exact same articles in one issue of the YDN.
Last week: -$1,150. Current Balance: $3,850.

Kerr Houston, Guest

Sure, I like to T.A. as much as the next guy, but giving a Smack lecture to these whippersnappers is the real McCoy. So get out your notebooks, class, and listen up: Yale football had a stunning Saturday at Brown, but UConn's a stiffer assignment. The Huskies will take this one ($1,000) despite a 100-yard game by Rashad Bartholomew ($500); a buck says the tailgating hordes from Storrs leave our IM fields covered in broken glass again. If it's defense you want, drive out to Xavier and watch Cheshire High hold 'em under 15 points tonight ($1,500). Finally, I've hated the Mets since '86, but they're a bunch of earnest fellas, and they're gonna take the wildcard slot ($600) as Olerud bangs out enough hits to win the title ($250).
Last week: +$1,200. Current Balance: $10,350.

Kerr Houston is a teaching assistant in the history of art department.

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