Ezra Stiles

Let's start with the best. The legendary Stiles B-hoops juggernaut finished the year on a tear, almost beating Timothy Dwight and Saybrook and refusing to forfeit to Branford. Co-captain Mike "She was legal!" Gerber '01 capped off a stellar season with a clutch protest against Trumbull which bagged us our first, only, and possibly most important win of the season. Thanks to Jan, Kogan, JK, Bum-Bum, and the Tacoma Strangler for sticking it out to the bitter end.

If I can get that excited about a B-hoops team ranked even lower than Yale in the RPI Power Ratings, you can bet I'll crap a brick for the Stiles teams that actually got us some points this winter. Check this out. C-hoops, with a 3-0 record, is the playoff fave behind "D" Bush, the Red Menace, Sang, Keith Berman, et al. Women's volleyball, by far the sexiest posse of playas ever to bump, set, spike, and serve it up in Yale history, finished strong as well. Coed squash, at 9-2, was the beneficiary of smashing talent and some big forfeits. Women's hoops, 6-4, would have swept the shirts if people had actually showed up. And swimming, which finally fielded a team, scored us some points against our favorite non-opponent, Trumbull.

Which brings me to my final point. I can't help but notice that the vast majority of the Moose's weight is being shouldered by the upperclassmen. What the hell is up with that? Can our frosh show at least a little college spirit here? Or at least start eating in our dining hall? Last time I checked, Commons did not field any IM teams. So quit bitching about the walk and frickin' help us out. We don't bite. Thank you.

(Compiled by the Student United Committee for Kaplowitz at Yale (SUCKY).)

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