minor threats

I-O-C-U-P

Frosh Games Day

Residential colleges square off

Cross Campus Lawn

Sat., Apr. 3, 12 to 5 p.m.

Free tailgate Finishing up at javelin, the Ezra Stiles Mooses...uh...the Ezra Stiles Meese...Moose. Many Moose. The Ezra Stiles Multiple Moose. Multiple Mooses. Multiple Meese...the Ezra Stiles Deer...ah, screw it. Next up, the Calhoun Claire Danes.

fat-free yoga

Yoga & Meditation for Beginners and Yoga Lovers

Tues., Apr. 6, 5 p.m.

Dwight Hall

Free, bring your own blanket Enjoy deep relaxation exercises. Explore your deeper self. Learn to meditate. Win a free Enya CD. Play it in your car. Go into a trance. Crash into a tree.

a self's life

A Bug's Life

Med School Film Society

Fri., Apr. 2, and Sat., Apr. 3

7:30 & 10 p.m.

$3, free for members Self awakes. Self quests for food. Must find food. Tree bark. Not food. Fragment of pickle. Food. Ketchup packet. Food. Self brings food. Food for Queen. Alert! Shadow of child. Child crushes self's self! Guts oozing from self! Self expires! Self hates self's life.

the ex!t zithers

Improvised Creative Music and

Improvised Dance

Sat., Apr. 3, 8 p.m.

1210 Chapel St.

$5 suggested donation Alright, first we're looking for a really hokey Bar Mitzvah dance tradition. Did someone say "horah?" Now we need a wacked-out musical instrument. You in the back? Did you say "glockenspiel?" Uh, okay. And finally, a funky type of footwear. I heard "moon shoes." Oh, dear God. Here we go. Maestro?

liar, liar

Doris Kearns Goodwin

"The Moral Authority of the President"

Tues., Apr. 6, 4 p.m.

Law School Auditorium Bill Clinton : Moral authority ::

(a) Cher : Talent

(b) Larry Flynt : Functional spine

(c) 'NSync : Heterosexuality

(d) Al Gore : A chance in hell

(e) None of the above

--Mr. Carpe D. Nutz, Queen Queeb, and Sean "Honey" Combs want to makes sure Burma Shave gets mentioned this time.

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