Calhoun

Yes, it's true, as a whole they're pretty useless. They'll be the first to tell you that. But some of them have singlehandedly brought a number of championships home to 189 Elm St. this season, and for that, many ill-clad and laundry-deficient Calhoun intramural athletes are thankful.

Where to start but with former secretary (representing the "Do-Nothing Party," from what I'm told) and everyone's favorite imbiber of chick drinks, Rasika "There are so many things I can put here to make your life miserable but I won't" Jayasekera '99. Rasika, or "The Ras," as he demands to be called, was the driving force behind Calhoun soccer, a key contributor to the volleyball teams, and, in general, didn't hurt the football team, even though he only learned how to throw last week.

Another former secretary, Sarah "Say it loud, I'm" Black "and I'm proud" '99, will also depart in a little over a month. She played so many ../sports I can't list them all here, but rest assured you'd be hard-pressed to find a tongue-wagging intramural athlete who has played on as many teams as she.

Jacob "Dang" Wouden '99 is pretty much a legend at this point. You look at the guy and ask, "What's this idiot doing wearing shorts in the middle of February?"--but then you see him play volleyball, basketball, tennis, table tennis, Ultimate, and squash, and you think to yourself, "I gotta start wearing shorts in the dead of winter."

Lest I forget, Calhoun will also miss the likes of Greg "When was the last time Missouri went to the Final Four?" Magee '99, Matthew "This just in...I hate Duke" Goldenberg '99, Alison "That's how we do it in the ATL, baby" Doernberg '99, Angela "I used to play a lot but I seem to have disappeared" Campbell '99, and a host of others who may not have played 15 ../sports like these characters, but whose contributions are duly noted in the Calhoun IMs Book of Life as well.

In closing, to the seniors we bid farewell, and good luck finding yourselves in some kibbutz in Israel or slaving away in med school somewhere. Just remember, we can always use a ringer or two out at the fields, so feel free to come on back to dust off those old cans of whup-ass for old times' sake.

(Compiled by an IM secretary who, with these kind words, deserves free shots at all of the people mentioned above in jello wrestling in one week's time.)

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