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Timothy Dwight
The calm has ended, and the red tsunami hits mercilessly on the empty beach. Our men's soccer team eviscerated opponents without using their hands, with Ross "What ya been" Eaton? '03, Matt "Kennedy's long lost brother" Sanchez '03, Aaron "If you don't" Gruber "I will" '03, Jonathan "The Immortal Sweet Daddy" Cain '03, and Abi "Cadabra" Sud '03 executing mortal strikes against the enemy. The women's soccer team of Becca"Pow-Wow" Popowsky '03, Temi "That you'll love me" Ifafore"ver" '03, Sara "Gonna kick your" Froikin "ass" '03 showed no mercy and all intimidation. The volleyball team virtually spontaneously combusted, with Thomas "Let me hear you say" Yae-"O" '03, Jen "Now you" Simmen "now you don't" '03, Maia "My-oh-My" Jasper '03, and Mark "Lord of the" Dancigers '03 leading the way. Lee "KY" Jelenic '01, Hay "Now you're an All-star" den Gallery '02, and Andrea "Kick 'em in the jimmy" Stewart '02 hit the long ball for TD golf. The men's football team performed arcade-like execution moves, with James "Mad Dog" Stevens '03, Paul "Kick 'em in the" Krikorian '03, and Jeremy Hogan"'s Hero" '03 eliminating the opposition.Blood steams off the infernos that are our red shirts and rippling muscles. The wind rages, an angry hurricane of force and will, a pride of lion warriors with fire in our hearts and victory in our grasp. Ashé.
(Received through divine inspiration by the Maddest Dog of them all, with 20/20 vision and a straight shot.)
All materials © 1999 The Yale Herald, Inc., and its staff.
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