Talking automaton Yalies are here to stay

Fact: You would not read this editorial if it began with the following sentence: "After a semester at Oxford, I learned a number of things about myself." Nor would you read it if it was titled "Internships link students, community groups;" "The few, the proud: Yale's union workers;" or "Why I don't play basketball for the Bulldogs anymore."

ALEXANDER KROLL/YH

It's sad, but true; the opinion is a dying breed at Yale. I take that back. Yale "opinions" are all over the place. The true opinion is a dying breed at Yale.

So here's mine—it has come to the point where student opinions and student editorials are nothing more than ho-hum pseudo-political clichés, the result of an I-need-to-believe-in-something sensibility that drives Yale activism. Yalies need causes, not necessarily to believe in or make some sort of better world but to show others that they identify themselves with something. Here, the top three ideologies Yalies pretend they have: "The IMF and the WTO have created a system of modern day colonialism;" "As the leader of the free world, the United States has an obligation to come to the aid of [insert problem-plagued African or eastern European country here];" and my personal favorite—"Hey, hey! Ho, ho! Sweatshop labor's got to go!"

It's not that these aren't commendable causes, it's that they're backup causes, opinions for those without real opinions. They are simply the tools employed to create the us-versus-them dichotomy that most "well-read, politically-knowledgeable" Yalies crave. At Yale, these political issues set the stage for pissing contests between student activists, rather than for actual intellectual debate. Put it this way: guys don't drive nice cars because they like nice cars. Guys drive nice cars because girls like nice cars. Yalies' opinions work the same way; students believe in something because other people like those causes. It's no longer about right or wrong. At Yale, he who generates the most publicity wins.

I'm not arguing that the opinions of Students Against Sweatshops (SAS) or Student Alliance to Reform Corporations (STARC), for example, are wrong (or right, for that matter). That's not the point. For all intents and purposes, no one who isn't a total jerk or a member of the Ayn Rand Society can really disagree with SAS. And that's the problem. You're not really going out on a ledge to say that sweatshop labor is wrong—it's about as easy an argument as you can make.

A proposition on Ca-lifornia's 1998 ballot makes for a wonderful example. Voters were asked whether or not they should be able to eat horses. Dissenters claimed that horses are recreational animals, not agricultural resources, and therefore they should not be available for consumption. Ask the average Joe whether a person should eat a horse, and he'll probably say no. Not because he really believes that one shouldn't eat a horse, but because, well, it just seems to be the right thing to say. Similarly, 1,000 Yalies may have voted for Yale to monitor the factories in which its university apparel is made, but it's not because they truly believe Yale should join the WRC—it's because it seems like the right thing to say.

Now, I don't think you should eat a horse, and I don't think you should endorse sweatshop labor, but I don't really care, and I don't think most Yalies do either. Go ahead and call me apathetic and insensitive. Students are so concerned with social acceptance that they refuse to express or listen to the politically incorrect convictions of most people. So instead, they write articles and form volunteer groups focused on the overly basic, socially-liberal concerns of moderate America. You'll never read a Yale editorial entitled "Yalies should buy more guns," or "No, I don't want to buy a flower for a dollar."

What's so disappointing, though, is that it's only a matter of time before SAS proponents drop their sewing machines to rally around another resume-padding, who-gives-a-crap hot button Yale issue. Things would certainly be a lot more interesting around here if students would remember that they were admitted here as individuals, each with something different to say and something unique to contribute to this school. So please, don't beat the dead horse—eat it.

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