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Smack Zone
Chepiga
I feel you, Tiger. It's hard to be so good at Smack—the fan letters, the media coverage, and the thousands of screaming girls throwing themselves at my feet. But please, please have some sympathy for Dolly "I'm too nice for Smack" Dolinsky, who's as lost as that RIS packet I ordered, and for Cornell, whose football team sucks as much as Al Trautwig's Olympic Bios ($1,000). Like poor Teddy, the Mets can't score, dropping two of three to Atlanta ($400). Women's and men's golf dominate ($500 each). Last Week: +$1,600, Current Balance: $8,385Diskant
Seems like betting on the Mets of recent has been like hooking up with that frosh at Zeta Psi: easy to do but risky as hell. So I'm steering clear of baseball in general this week and heading for the Meadowlands, where the Giants are gonna prove why crowing the Redskins as champs in the pre-season was a big mistake ($400). Speaking of mistakes, Keyshawn will make the Jets sorry they decided to unload his large salary and larger mouth as Tampa Bay improves to 4-0 ($400), while the Rams will look super in Atlanta ($500). Game of the week—football heads to Ithaca to defend their title against Cornell. I'm counting on number 801 ($400)...Last Week: + $1,800, Current Balance: $4,900Dolinsky
Here are the facts, ladies and gentlemen: Yanks will clinch the division by Friday ($500). My girl Marion will get at least four out of five ($300 per medal). And the Braves will clean Shea Stadium next week ($300 a game). Here's another set of facts: Diskant, your frosh was a wet dream, just like the Mets doing anything but losing. Chepiga, if only your shuttlecock was as fast as Denmark's Camilla Martin's, when she takes China's Zhichao Gong for the gold in Olympic badminton ($500). Last Week: + $1,000, Current Balance: $6,300Hitesh, Celeb Guest
A Smack first: an interview
YH: Hitesh, do you follow sports?
Hitesh: Yeah, man.
YH: Who do you think will win this week in the Olympics?
Hitesh: I don't watch the Olympics, man.
YH: Well, what do you watch?
Hitesh: Cricket.
YH: Who's going to win in cricket?
Hitesh: India over Pakistan next month, man ($1,000). Last Week: +$1,600, Current Balance: $5,950
Hitesh works behind the counter at Krauszer's.
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