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Smack Zone
Chepiga
229 votes? If only Al had told me, I would have sent Laurie down there to "drum up some support." I mean, who's better at gettin' out the bushes, Jesse Jackson or Randell? At least men's hockey doesn't need overseas ballots to win—they'll win two more this weekend ($500 each). Princeton football, like a freshman with a crappy roommate, will be screwed this weekend ($600). The Knicks stop acting like kindergarteners and win Saturday ($400). And that Butterfly Ballot, that was Teddy's brilliant idea. Way to go, McFly. Last Week: -$305. Current Balance: $9,160.DIskant
Maybe it was the chick who tried to order a martini at
Naples. Or the guy in the Armani suit in line at Krauzer's. Yes, there
is no doubt about it—the Tigers are in town. Their noses are higher
than a bunch of "Greenies" at a Ralph Nader rally, but that
will all come to an end Saturday. The Bulldogs will romp the elites in a
tune-up for the Crimson next weekend ($1,000). Meanwhile, men's hockey
is on a tear. They'll continue their remarkable season with a pair of
wins this weekend at the Whale ($300 apiece). Penn State travels to Ann
Arbor for an utterly meaningless game. Michigan takes this one, for what
it's worth ($300 to me) and Tig drowns his sorrows away by working the
frosh screw. Last Week: +$1000 Current Balance:$11,400
Dolinsky
Yale hockey is going to rock the Whale—St. Lawrence and
Clarkson are going down faster and harder than Teddy on a first date
($500 each). Oklahoma levels Texas A&M ($1,000) and Kansas rolls
over for Nebraska like Chepiga in heat ($500). The big bad Yale ballers
will walk over Ohio State ($675) and volleyball moves past the first
round of the Ivy Tournament this weekend ($600). Who said that politics
weren't exciting? Chepiga is down in Palm Beach macking it with the
Jewish grandmas. $20 says Nader wins Florida before Diskant pops his
cherry. Last Week: -$1,000. Current Balance: $8,100.
"Ralph Nader," Guest
Boo-ya. Nader in the house. (This is how I appeal to college students.) So what if Green didn't get five percent and I may have, heh, "spoiled" the election for Gore? Gotta get worse before you get better, right? Huh? (Ooh, the kids look restless. Just do the picks, Ralph—the Princeton kids will be kinder and stupider.) So in the less precarious world of sports, every Detroit team continues to pay for the sins of the automotive industry (Read my book! Please! Oh forget it...) by losing this weekend ($900 on the Lions, $200 for the Red Wings), that football team in green wins ($400 on the Jets), and, uh, Yale football wins ($1,000)! Thank you! Uh...thank you? Please? Last Week: -$900. Current Balance: $12,395.
"Ralph Nader" might help Bush win this week, but all you have to do to be Smack Guest is play Pick the Pros at www.yaleherald.com/pickthepros.
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