Clash of the Thai food Titans

There may seem to be neither rhyme nor reason behind the culinary wealth of our mid-sized Connecticut city. Then again, considering how much bitching New Haven receives each year, perhaps it's only out of self-defense that the Elm City has an abundance of great Thai food restaurants with which to smack haughty Yalies over the head and taste buds. But as we all know from that great trilogy of Highlander movies...oh yeah, and that fourth one, "there can be only one." Which one? Four A&E writers go toe-to-toe in a satay slugfest.

Tantric Thai Taste

Some may say that New Haven's cup runneth over when it comes to quality Thai restaurants...but they're all full of shit. There's only one, and it's Thai Taste.

EUGENE WONG/YH

For those of you who enjoy dining out at Bangkok Gardens or those other two places (so unworthy adversaries they are that their names don't even register), there's no helping you. Most likely you prefer McDonald's to Louis' and Dominos to Sally's. You're lost. For years now the true gourmands of Yale have been frequenting this subterranean haunt and treating their tongues to the culinary equivalent of super-hero sex while you've been settling for a hand-job at lesser establishments.

The moderately priced menu offers a solid selection of Thai food standards. The best way to start your meal would be with the Chicken Satay (that's grilled skewered chicken strips with a sesame peanut sauce). Always delicious, it's also a safe bet for even the most unadventurous diners. For those who want to push their palate to the limit, the Thai Sampler is perfect—in addition to the Satay, it offers four other very tasty morsels to whet your appetite before the feast.

Ordering main courses can be problematic since there are simply too many options. Noodle lovers find themselves subject to the eternal dilemma of "Is it a Pad Thai night or a Drunken Noodle night?" while the curry folk flap about on the floor in Massaman-induced ecstasy. Thai iced tea complements any meal nicely, but one caveat: it's perhaps best to ask the waitress to bring it with the main courses, as it seldom lasts that long otherwise.

The final trump card Thai Taste has to play against its competitors is its somewhat strange, but certainly interesting, décor. Truly something to be marveled at, it defies all definition except some ridiculous slogan like "preppie's first acid-trip motif." The wooded interior adorned with crew oars and plaques bearing the residential college crests brings to mind a certain "old blue" quality, while neon clocks and a bubbling fountain in the middle of the dining area shatter this image entirely. All in all, Thai Taste is a delicious meal and a fun restaurant to eat at.

  —Robby O'Connor

Pad Thai said knock you out (huh!)

"Thai Taste, Thai Taste, Thai Taste," mutter the witless masses as they head down the steps to their one flavorful meal a week, not even noticing the other, oddly decorated Thai place down the street. That place, with the purple outside and green-lettered sign, is Pad Thai. A battle between the delicious—if slightly more expensive—dishes of my favorite Thai restaurant and those of that other Thai hole, not classy enough to reside on street level, is like one between Lennox Lewis and Mike Tyson. No matter how mindlessly Yalies may leap for Thai Taste, just as fools clamor to see Tyson, you know that in the end Pad Thai is gonna ruthlessly bust up all pretenders to the throne.

Standard Thai appetizers like Satay are available, but if you asked her nicely, your mother could make Satay, so go for the Tod Man Pla; even if neither fish cakes nor cucumber sauce sound tasty on their own, the combination is delicious. Soup makes a great appetizer too, particularly the aromatic Coconut Soup or the (just plain cool-sounding) Silver Soup, but leave space because there are a ton of great entrées. As the name would suggest, Pad Thai's Pad Thai is the best in town. But if, like me, you eat Thai food to test the taste buds, follow the starred menu to the Drunken Chicken, Green Curry, or the excellent fisherman dish. One star means it's got a kick, two means it's hot, three means you'd better order a few Thai beers before you start. The buzz from the alcohol and the sheer power of the dish should wash away all painful memories of having ever eaten those bland YUDS cod bites.

Pad Thai's menu isn't as consistently strong as Thai Taste's, but with nothing to match any of the above meals in either spice or flavor, Pad Thai scores a seventh-round KO over its lower-priced, lower-quality nemeses. Those other three restaurants end up playing the hapless Peter McNeely to Pad Thai's Ali in this heavyweight division, and you'd best recognize that fact the next time you're looking for Thai food. Bitch.

—Josh Drimmer

Bad-ass Bangkok Gardens

After eating the Chicken Satay at Bangkok Gardens, I wanted to run out and slap the chefs at the other Thai restaurants on Chapel Street. I'm used to bruising myself and pulling my shoulder muscles trying to cut my chicken with the side of a fork, silently cursing the fact that Thai cuisine doesn't allow for knives. So I was surprised and practically overcome with joy when my Satay at Bangkok Gardens came sliding so easily off of its skewer. For once I was able to slice it into manageable bites without denting my fork or the sides of my fingers.

Too bad it took me this long to see the light. It looks like, for the first time since I left my parents' care three and a half years ago for the dining halls of Yale and the greasy, cheap restaurants of New Haven, I'll finally enter the storied land of Grade-A meat, thanks to Bangkok Gardens.

So, what I want to know now is this: which one of you has been spreading lies about how Bangkok Gardens is more expensive than the other Thai restaurants in the neighborhood? People retreat again and again to the safety of the Holy Trinity of Thai: Massaman Curry, Chicken Satay, and Pad Thai—and, for all three dishes, Bangkok Gardens offers cheap prices, similar to or the same as the ones offered by their competitors. Plus, they're flavored better, and the shrimp in Bangkok Gardens' Pad Thai actually look like shrimp, leaving the other restaurants' shellfish looking like twisted little hunks of death by comparison.

But of course, there can be no comparison. The people at Bangkok Gardens aren't stingy bastards; indeed, the sweet chili sauce flows freely and, per tradition, you get free, individually wrapped packets of tasty candy goodness with your check. Good meat and free peppermints are enough to keep this simple girl happy, and anyone who settles for less in New Haven is a sucker.

—Ann Ritter

Indochine Pavilion: good 'n plenty

Iron Chef Thai Part Four: Indochine Pavilion-san has stepped in the kitchen, and challengers best depart. For those of you man enough to take the beef rough and tough, put your money in the Pavilion on the Shaking Beef. You wimps who like your beef tender, take your limp-ass bills and spend them at Pad Thai.

Want your dishes to have distinct and discernible flavors? Okay prima donna, head up the road to The 'Kok and eat their Massaman Curry and Garlic Shrimp to your heart's content, but don't come crying to me when you don't get lucky that night.

And stop whining about the low attendance rate at Indochine. What's the matter, empty restaurant too lonely for you? Got no friends? Sure, for you losers who want to eat in the company of strangers, go drown your sorrows at Thai Taste. And what up with those windows for the pedestrians to look down on me? Am I in a zoo? Did I come here to be ogled, laughed at, and spat on? Oh that's right, I came to eat, but I won't be doing that too soon since I could Pad my own f***ing Thai in the time it takes them to serve me theirs.

All you pyros, head to the Pavilion at double-speed and order their Fried Ice Cream. I'm serious, they light the cold cow juice on fire at the table and it doesn't even melt. Isn't that against the laws of physics or something? I don't know. It sure is tasty though.

What's that saying about bad food and not enough of it? You can get plenty at the Indo-chine Pavilion, especially if you come at lunchtime for their all-you-can-eat buffet for just $4.95. And what other restaurant in this Haven of ours offers the cuisines of both Vietnam and Thailand? That's right suckers, two Asian birds, one damn stone. —Emily Liebert

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