minor threats

where have you gone, lew alcindor?

`Milwaukee'

Fri., Feb. 16, 8 and 10 p.m., Sat. Feb. 17 at 8 p.m.

Off-Broadway Space

$2

The Brewers suck. The state of Wisconsin sucks. Pabst Blue Ribbon sucks. Laverne and Shirley has been cancelled for years. Don't worry, MT will bring hankies for everyone.

pirates of cell block 4

`Patience'

Fri., Feb. 16, and Sat., Feb. 17, 8:30 p.m.

Timothy Dwight Dining Hall

$2

Unfortunately, the TD dining hall will look like Attica when, just 30 minutes into the show, a massive riot will break out, due to angry audience "Impatience." Don't worry, MT will bring bats for everyone.

...directed by penny marshall!

`True West'

Fri., Feb. 16, 8 and 11 p.m., Sat. Feb. 17, 2 and 8 p.m.

Nick Chapel

$2

The historic reenactment of the original Wild Wild West screenplay, featuring three big mechanical spiders, Abraham Lincoln's reanimated, dancing torso, a new theme song by Puff Daddy ("featuring" Kenny Rogers), and yet more slavery jokes. Don't worry, MT will bring Spike Lee.

fear and loathing at Long Wharf

`The Mandrake Root'

Through Sun., Mar. 18

Long Wharf Theater II  

Damn, the last time MT took some of that crazy Mandrake Root, it ended up rolling through Las Vegas with a bunch of Talking Carpets and a big Samoan guy who looked like Benicio Del Toro. Don't worry, MT will bring a typewriter. 

doggystyle

Auditions for `You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown'

Fri., Feb. 16, and Sat., Feb. 17, 2 to 4 p.m.

Sign up in Dwight Hall

"It's not you, it's me," Sally said. "I'm in love with Snoopy." "But Sally, can't we still be friends?" Don't worry, MT will bring the five-cent psychiatrists.

—MT may be bringin' everything, but Mr. Sandman, Leviticus E. Grutchfield, Captain Obvious, and Koopa Troopa ain't bringin' nothin' 'cause a funny thing happened on the way to the Forum...they got really trashed and forgot it all.

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