Berkeley

B-hoops won its final game to finish the season with a winning record. The young team consisting of elders Thad No "points for you" vak '02 and Cole "Defender of the goal" Ferguson '03, outside shooter Pete "The man to beat" Okolo '04, and the Asian triad known as the Wa-Ching Gang (Jimmy Chang '04, Daniel Kim '04, and Damon Nakamura '04), which should be back next year with a bang.

BK bowling ended the season strong with two victories, thanks to the work of Bill "24 karat" Goldman '01 and Jason "No relation to bruce" Lee '01. The heroine of the day, however, was Regina "I perform better when I see big balls" Sieber '02, who bowled a 171 in her final game!

In slightly more comical news, BK waterpolo finally managed to get a win! A big thank you to Davenport for forfeiting out of existence and sparing our team the horrific view of your barely clothed bodies.

The 10-1 men's volleyball team proved they are the shit—and the volleyball champions—with a titanic victory over the suckas from Pierson. The BK squad offered some amazing blocks from Jimmy "Five-foot-one" Chang '04 and Rob "I am the wall!" Bernheim '02. Drew "The Hammer" Baldwin '03 and Darrell "The Sickle" Hartman '03 were playing with their usual grace, leaving Jason "The Iron Chef" Lee to serve up some hot balls. "Scary" Gary Thompson '03 and Brian "They call me BJ" Johnson '01 dropped the huge slams, while Special Good Sportsman of the Season goes to David Kim '04 of Pierson for trying to start shit after the game. (Hey Dave, the ref says "Hi!") Next time try playing to win instead of whining for points. Jackass. 

(Every place the writer of this update goes, he sees the same hoes—and they're usually from Trumbull.)

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