Smack Zone

What a semester! Wiecks and Fitzpatrick may not know what an ERA is, but they sure know how to get those bats swinging. With their dedication and stamina, this sports section brought home the real stories, from the football team's true measurements ($500 says Fitzpatrick's ruler will be back in action at Tang this weekend) toWiecks's collaboration with the managing board, the Herald was on top and in control. My last bet as sports editor has to be with the JE women's Tang team taking it all this weekend, $800. Last Week: +$1,700. Current Balance: $8,800.

Wiecks

The 2000-01 school year may have ended, but the spring hunting season is just beginning around the Herald office. No, I'm not referring to animals...well, aside from those animals who proudly boast their membership in [[Delta]][[Kappa]][[Epsilon]]. Erin "I can get into Tang for free" Fitzpatrick will finally have a chance to test out her Herald office hunting hat ($500), and Anna "I'll do more than corner for JE this weekend at Tang" Dolinsky will show [[Delta]][[Kappa]][[Epsilon]] just how well JE Sux—and I'm certainly not referring to drinking ($1,000). Last Week: +$100. Current Balance: $11,000.

Fitzpatrick

As I sit down to write my last line for Smack Zone, I wish that I had one more week. This weekend I hear that Dolinsky will be standing in Line, but the big question is will she be first or second? As for Wiecks, it ain't kid, whether you like it or not. In NBA playoff action, let's take Philadelphia over Indiana ($300), Milwaukee over Orlando ($200). And turning to the NASCAR scene, in the Subway 300 Qualifying race, I'm going to go for Jeff Gordon finishing in the top 10. Last Week: +$300. Current Balance: $7,400.

Kate Moran, Guest

While Dolinsky, Fitzpatrick, and Wiecks have succeeded in making push-up bras and ribbons—yes, ribbons—a mainstay in the Herald office, they have not upheld the standard of utter inanity maintained by Smack Bitch Emeritus Laurie Randell, Hamden High '98, SY '02, DIV '06. I'll bet Randell's first-hatched that the Yanks vindicate themselves against the Red Sox this weekend. Oh, and Aaron's haircut is ugly. Last Week: +$0. Current Balance: $9,300. Kate Moran, DC '02, is editor-in-chief of the Herald.

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