Branford

Hey kids, it's me again. Branford is climbing the rankings once again, largely due to our two stellar football teams. Against Calhoun, our men's team toyed with our foes during the first half, but thanks to the efforts of Jon "Tell your mom I said hi" Kossak '03, the team was able claim victory. The coed team was able to hand Calhoun a monster defeat, thanks largely to Jim "The ref" Schroeder '03, whose lightning quick speed proved too much for the 'Hounies. Our two football teams then clashed with TD, whose football program has been notable this season. Our men were able to defeat them, thanks to Mike "the long bomb" Corcoran '04 and Pete "I can catch with my face" Walker '03. Also notable in this game was Josh "Hungry like the" Wolf '02 with his football debut this season. Our coed team battled TD to a hard- fought tie though short a girl the entire game. But with the help of Adam "Mutant monkey master's illegitimate son" Frank '02 and Tony "I hide my inner feelings inside a shell of sarcasm" Mendoza '03, the team was able to stave off defeat once again, continuing our undefeated season thus far.

In other sports, men's soccer beat TD senseless this week. Thanks to the defense of Alex "I'm gonna stop you from shootin'" Galuten '04 and the offensive power of Lindsay "Legs up to his neck" Eliot '04, our soccer team was able to retain some dignity and cap off a great day.

The true test will come next week, and I would just like to say that I hope that Saybrook and Stiles are ready for the juggernaut. Also, I would just like to point out that Jordan "Damn, I'm good looking" Hinkees '02 has contributed nothing to the IM effort so far this year, but he does need a screw date for tonight, ladies...

(Compiled by the guy in the shorts with the hair).

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